hello bloggers :/ I'm kinda down at this time of the night .. I dun noe, just wish to let it all out here .. I know those who are reading this are my close friends and my boyfriend .. maybe .. if he still remembers that I'm always updating my blog .. nonetheless, I feel so empty tonight .. I couldn't figure out the reason .. and as I'm typing this, I realised that, we can't always expect much from people .. we have to be standing on our own feet, needless if we're attached, married or even single .. all my hopes were crushed tonight .. I forced myself to be strong .. to not cry over petty matters .. but then again, I'm soft inside .. It's just ME .. I can't sleep for the past few nights, missing him, because he's far away from me .. but tonight, I can even close my eyes .. because I know that he's back, but yet, I still miss him .. I shouldn't be feeling this since he's back .. and why am I feeling this ? Maybe I should just blame myself .. blame myself for hoping that he will give all his attention .. blame myself for hoping that he knows that I've been missing him .. blame myself for poking my nose into his MSN chats, blame myself for confronting a girl that chatted with him before, blame myself for standing up for him, blame myself for EVERY SINGLE THING !!
Things have changed and my biggest fear is that he will change :') every night before going to sleep, I'll always pray to God to make us a stronger being .. to be able to overcome all the hurdles in life .. but then, I guess God doesn't YET wanna answer my prayers .. I will never stop praying to HIM .. now that he's safe at home, I'm more than contented :') Gdnite love .. I love you and I miss US :')
It's already 3.38am now .. and I still can't sleep .. everybody's at their dreamland .. and I'm still stuck in reality .. I'm tired today .. walking the whole day with my friends .. I guess I laughed too much just now .. and I'm sitting here, crying at night .. life's unpredictable .. we wouldn't know what will happen in 5 minutes time .. how I wish I can work .. but I'll just wish upon wishes :) I guess he's already asleep now .. I'm planning to go to kimie's place in the morning later .. but, I can't even sleep NOW .. my body tells me that I'm tired .. but, my mind couldn't stop thinking .. I shall have to off the internet connection in a while and I guess I'll just lay in bed staring at the wall .. maybe, that way, I can sleep .. gdnite bloggers .. iloveyou boyfriend :')
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